Choices

A month has passed...life is starting to return to normal.
There are times in our lives we all do it.
Wonder what we have done to get to where we are at
Think about the future
Ponder the inevitable

The one thing I think about the most are my kids. It is amazing how lucky I am. There are people in this world who cant even have kids...and I have two beautiful children.

I have a loving wife, who, no matter what is going on, still gives me the support and love like the day we met. There are many days that the average woman would have packed up and left town...nope, she is still here, and still loves me, even with all my faults.

I have a sister who always finds time (with a schedule that would mirror 3 people) to call and check in, ask how I am doing, whatever....I can say that there is nobody I would want as my sister...nobody compares to you :)

I have my brothers -- Bill and Rick -- that for 20 years, have been my backbone in life. No matter the distance...no matter the situations...we were always there for each other...and though they may not be blood, they are brothers none-the-less.

I have a friend who I work with. Linz basically said "...marriages are hard work, keep working at it. You aren't the quitting type" and she is so right...again, that old saying "2x4 across the back of the head"...yeah, she gave me one...thanks Linz...I have always said, you dont hold anything back...some people may say you are blunt...I just say you are honest. :)

All of this leads me to the choices we all face in everyday life. For me, moving around as a kid, the choice was easy - make friends, or stay lonely. A question as simple as "Can I set my stuff here" on the cafeteria table at lunch has led to 2 friendships I could never want to live without. Each day we are given the choice to either help ourselves or help others. Somedays, you actually get to do both, but unless we choose to not only help others, but also help ourselves, almost like Pay It Forward, we will forever be stuck in the "what might have been" mindset. You also have to take care of yourself. You are the best person to take care of yourself. Nobody can do a better job of taking care of yourself better than you.

Well, I am off to Sleepy-ville. I am finally getting over my cold...hopefully it stays away. Take care of yourselves.....

The reason for no-posts :)

Well hello everyone!

3 weeks was long enough without a post, but there is a reason....a 9 pound 2 ounce reason bundle of joy :) (for those keeping track at home 9-2 as in #92 as in Green Bay Packer legend Reggie White...ok, sure I lost a couple people there) :

There's my "little guy"!!! Totally proud to be a daddy again....yesterday 12/29/05

Holidays were pretty stressful with the pregnancy, working, etc...but we managed to have a nice holidays. This little present was a week late, but it was well worth the wait.

Hope everyone had a nice holiday....may 2006 bring you everything you want in your life.

J-Dawg

The Path of Least resistance

There are so many different situations that we deal with on a daily basis. For me, with work, it is a constant struggle between which drivers to put onto which loads. Which freight needs to move, and which freight do we miss delivery on. We have that same struggle every day in life. For me, I make choices every day...sometimes it is to work on my MAP process (management job), sometimes it is to make a call to talk, or drop an email because I can...it's all about choices.

I make my choices based upon what or how I am feeling. Right now, I just feel like ... well no matter what choice I make, someone is not going to be happy with me. Sometimes its my wife, sometimes, its my friends, sometimes, it is me myself and I.

We make choices every day that shape the rest of our lives...and sometimes those choices are met with resistance, either from your spouse, your family, or your friends. But the way I see it, sometimes, you just have to make decisions that are best for you, because you have think of yourself as You, Inc. If you were in charge of You, Inc. right now, would you fire You? Nobody is going to take care of #1 better than yourself. Sometimes you have to take a risk, in the hopes that it works out in the end. You cant stay living somewhere because you are afraid to move on with your life. You cant stay at a job, because you have become comfortable at it. You cant keep doing the same things over and over again, because eventually you get into a rutt. Well, I am a risk-taker, and sometimes that meets with resistance. Which is fine, because I know I have made that choice, and will deal with the consequences of that decision.

If you take the path of least resistance all the time, you really arent living your life, you are living the life that other people WANT you to live. I ask others for advice, but I still will live my life in the way I chose. I will live with the consequences of the choices I make.

Planets not aligning

Today has just been a very off day for me. From moment one this morning, I just havent been right. My whole schedule has been off. I went to town today for an appointment - only thing was, I was a week early.Maybe its just one of those days, and I just need to be left alone...who knows! All I know is that sometimes, I just want to be left alone -- me and my MP3s...to just "be".

Every get that way?

Maybe not MP3s...maybe something else...maybe just you and a bag of chocolate? or even, a good book? Or just --- alone from the world time?

My release is music...I relax, relate, release to music. No matter what I need, I can achieve it through music --

• Anger -- Limp Bizkit - Break Stuff
• Relax -- Jazz for the Quiet Times
• Release -- Joe Satriani -- pretty much anything
• Aggression -- Pantera - 5 Minutes Alone
• Sorrow -- Point of Grace -- pretty much anything

Some days, you just need to "be"

Page 153

Musical choices while writing:
Switchfoot - Let That Be Enough (click here)
and
3 Doors Down - Here Without You (click here)

Back in September I believe it was, I had mentioned that I had graduation college, and been accepted into Phi Theta Kappa (PTK is Honor Society for 2-year colleges). One thing that I neglected to mention was my national recognition for being on The National Dean's List. I had totally forgotten about it until just yesterday when I received a package in the mail...and I didnt recognze the sender. Michelle had called me from working to let me kow that my computer parts were in (funny, I didnt order any, but hey, if people are gonna randomly send me free computer parts, I am OK with that!). So when I got home (came home early from work, wasnt feeling well at all), I opened the package and there it was...The National Dean's List Registry for 2005. I was mentioned for being on the list from 2004-2005, which I thought was a great honor. Right there in black and white

Page 153

I did so much more than anyone ever expected me to. I graduated with honors, and am now nationally recognized for being on the National Dean's List...how cool is that! :)

My wife who reads my writings asked why I never post anything positive about myself. She said this is the perfect thing to write about...and she is so right! I write about all the turmoil and painful things I have been through, or what peaved me that day or whatever. I have written about sports, politics, etc, but never something positive for me.

SO THIS POST IS FOR ME
YAY ME!!!

OK I am back off my soapbox. But it is a great feeling to know that you have done something like that, and being recognized like that. But, none of it would have been possible withouth the support of Michelle. She was there with me through thick and thin, through all my moody finals (yeah can you image me crabby??), through my struggles with Accounting and doing what I needed to do to not only pass the class, but go from a C to an A in 8 weeks, through all my late nights at campus working on projects (downloading music too) and finalizing reports (while downloading music of course), she was there. She carried the workload around the house when working fulltime, schooling fulltime, and DJing every weekend took 95% of my time away from my family. She made it possible, so all of this (PTK, Dean's List, CIS degree) is because of Michelle too :)

Well, a short but sweet one....it is after midnight, and I need to keep getting my rest so I don't get sick again...Off to Sleepy-ville :)

42.6, 1853 and 95

Now I know you are all sitting there wondering what in THE hell do all those numbers mean. Well, I will get to that. I have never written about some of my struggles, and my wife pointed this out to me, so I thought I would dedicate this post to a couple of my struggles. Most of the time, I listen to music while I am typing, so I thought I would also include what I am listening to, and link the song if you want it....today is Skid Row's Monkey Business (click here for song) - just because everyone needs more cowbell from time to time ;)

42.6

This is the number of pounds I have lost since January 7th of this year. When I started this journey, a journey that I never thought I would be making, I was 389, in the worse shape of my life, and opening Christmas gifts with my child and my sister's children was a chore. I could barely walk around my dad's property and not feel I had just finished a triathalon...I was exhausted, achy, hurting...both physically and mentally...but didnt know why. Well, I kinda knew why - I had turn the buffet into a normal meal. I ate all the dang time!! I was hungry I ate. I was angry I ate. I was sitting doing nothing, I ate. I just got home, and I ate. I ate like there was no tomorrow, and if I kept eating, there WOULDNT be a tomorrow. I was gonna be dead from a heat attack! Every 6 months, I get a workup of blood and stuff, and my cholesterol was at 140 last time I was in and my sugars were at 110...both in the normal range! Usually someone my size is about 300-400 and about 160-190 respectively. So on the cholesterol and blood sugar side I was fine (no, not THAT fine, you know...fine!). So now I just needed to get right...so I did-I cut sodas out of my life completely (OK, not completely, I still enjoy my jack and coke from time to time) but other than a mixed drink, no soda! I turned to water...at first I had to have 2-3 of those Crystal Light lemonade packets in a 32 oz pitcher....now 1 packet lasts 2 pitchers....water I can drink now and not feel icky!...portion sizes are way down from what they were, and I am just doing things right.

1853

Now you are probably thinking to yourself what could 1853 be, right? Well, that is the number of days that Michelle and I have been married :) 1853 and counting! I am hoping to get to 26000 days (we would be married over 71 years at that time...honey, you would be like 100 years old!! (to quote from Finding Nemo))...I am just thankful for every day that we are together. Thank you for all the chances to make us right...I know I somedays dont show you how much I love you...and somedays I wonder why you are still with me, but thankful that you still are....

95

This is very simple...it is a continuation of 42.6 -- this is how much I want to keep losing. Yeah, I wish I could do Biggest Loser, but I dont think 12.6 million people need to know I am ... husky! Yeah, you know you were a big kid, when shopping for pants -- they had slim, regular and HUSKY...nothing like giving a kid a complex early in life eh?

Hope all of you have a wonderful day, wonderful weekend, and I will write more later :)

J

Just a funny little diddy (Not P. Diddy)

I finally found the email about the seven words (and 1 sound) that women use. Just as an FYI, you are really in trouble if they double up (NOTHING, I'm FINE!)...if they follow that up with the sigh....prepare the couch for a nice evening.


Words Women Use


Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.


Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour.
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.


Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something" and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".


Whatever
If this word is used just leave the room. No matter what you come back with, it doesn't matter - she has already made up her mind and you're pretty much done for the evening. She will typically use this word because she cannot use profanity due to her surroundings.

Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission, DON'T DO IT!


Loud Sigh
Although not actually a word, the loud sigh is often misunderstood by men.
A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".


That's Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements that woman can make to a man.
"That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.


Thanks
This is the least used of all words in the female vocabulary. If a woman is thanking you, do not question it, just say you're welcome and back out of the room slowly.